Does anyone believe in second chances any more?
Did you ever ask yourself what you would do if you had only one day left of living?
I think about that all the time. I think society is so busy focusing on the actual daily routines that we don’t often stop & think how we act, live, if we aspire or inspire. Are we just co-existing amongst mankind and consuming oxygen?
Today, I lived with just that powerful thought in my mind. I didn’t do anything extra ordinary like going sky diving or spent a whole whack of money foolishly on lavish things, but truthfully my heart was filled with sadness. I felt the weight of the world upon my shoulders, just as I felt the weight of one simple unresolved issue with someone who once had a special meaning to me.
Before I go any further, you should know that I simply have zero enemies. I may have people in my life who don’t understand me or entirely know me and made decisions not to have me in their life. That is something I cannot change. I’ve had lovers and boyfriends who will always be part of my heart & even they don’t have any anger from me, only good wishes. With that said, I still feel unsatisfied with some issues that pangs my heart into the abyss of darkness where only light wants to shine.
I’d like to think that every single person on this planet has the chance to alter their life every second they experience life. Just as the planet rotates, with each passing sunset a new day awakes us with brand new opened eyes. The world is so tiny when you take a look at the cosmos and how precious and small we all are. I would love nothing more then for people to just get along, find that inner peace within and pursue their passions in a courteous way without the bicker and back stabs. I really honestly wish that.
I grasp the concept of “Once bitten, twice shy” or “Fool me once shame on you & fool me twice shame on me” but I don’t wish to exercise it. Why is that? Perhaps I truly wholeheartedly believe that life is what we make it and chances exist with each passing second. We are the ones in control of our destiny & only we can undo the done as well as do the unknown.
This may indeed be my day of revelation and tomorrow I may awake to some harsh and bitter rude awakening or sad news, but here I am taking a chance at something simply only my heart can sense with the tiniest speck of dust in a message to give to the world. Love each other more.
If you think about that for just a second, it is not that hard to imagine. A peaceful loving world that my soul feels, wants and desires. For you, for me and for the future of our kids. Love is so beautiful and powerful.
I’ve decoded the message of life. With my number sequence of 5261492 revealed to me few years ago, I’ve deciphered the code. I was given a message that only I could comprehend and decode and it is my duty to write about what I am learning & perceiving. I am a messenger.
Life slips away so quickly with such frailty and before we know another day is here, only to slide too with the rush of daily jobs & traffic, errands or whatever it may be. We are like little worker ants so focused on ourselves and our individuality, our tiny lives doing whatever the wind blows our way, where out there in the real world togetherness is what we all lack.
Perhaps the joy that one feels from the living is the excitement and unexpected surprises along the days. The spontaneity along with unforeseen life’s unfolding is what makes us all go round. To see the joy in the faces of those who tug on our heartstrings, the music that embraces and uplifts us, the constant tears that flow from the same pain, lived with different directions.
What if today was your last day?
I think about the 2012 Phenomenon all the time, where the end of civilization as we know it is suppose to come to an end and a possible new era will begin. Many believe this is in fact the end of the world.
However, as a believer in the higher dimensional power I cannot imagine the being some of us call “God” can be so destructive only to destroy all the beauty and wonder once upon a time created. Whoever we are, I believe we are all entitled to enjoy fully the goodness along with hardships in hopes that those hardest and toughest moments alter and expand our pea size minds and lead us towards the rainbow of graciousness, kindness and abundance we all seek.
I believe in the goodness of mankind and the gentle heart we are all capable of. The power of healing is higher then us and that we are all very capable of moving forward with lessons learned only to alter our higher consciousness, constantly altering our futures just as the energy is constant.
I will never stop believing that with LOVE, confidence, faith and belief – all things are possible.
I find it unsettling when NASA has a page on the end of the world explaining in their own way the “Beginning of the End” and answering common questions. Here I am questioning what people would do if we had only one day to live, where my future seems so uncertain, in the hands of a greater power then I can fathom.
It makes me ill to think that my children I gave birth to in hopes they become amazing contributing humans in this civilization could cease to exist with just one big bang. The truth is, it could happen any time.
Tonight could be the last night I close my eyes and never to awake, but if that shall be my destiny – I just want everyone to know that I loved & cared my deepest, hardest and with all my might. I hope I left footprints in each of your hearts.
I believe in second chances and I shall believe them that much more in my afterlife.
Today, right now, this very second you have a gift of life, embrace the ones you love, give thanks and praise and make a difference in your life. It’s never too late.
May the heavens shine upon you with the grace of infinite love.
I was always taught to perform an act of kindness every day. Whatever it may be a huge one or the smallest act, it’s all significant. At the same time, I find that the people who appear least deserving of your kindness are the ones you should indeed perform your good deed to.
A single act of kindness throws out roots in all direction,
and the roots spring up and make new trees.
The greatest work that kindness does to others,
is that it makes them kind themselves.
– Amelia Earhart –
When I was a little girl & we took street carts to the city and it was jammed pack with people while my grandma told me to sit, who was clearly older then me while she stood I knew deep down the rules she taught me. As soon as an elderly lady or man entered the cart I would stand up and offer up my seat. It’s just how I was brought up and it cannot be changed now, it’s part of who I am.
In my teens I was at our local down town market square with few friends while a lady walked out of the restroom with a wad of toilet paper dragging by her shoe and while my friends chuckled I quickly ran up to her and told her to save her unpleasant embarrassment. I was nudged and poked why I told but I could care less what my friends thought of me.
About 5 years ago I was driving through Tim Horton’s. I decided to pay for the vehicle behind me their purchase and with my luck it was only two cups of coffee. I paid for it and drove away while the lady at the window gave me a huge sincere smile. No thank you was needed from the recipient unknowing behind me and it left me feeling absolutely amazing. These are just few of the countless times for me for some reason reflected today.
It doesn’t matter how the pay it forward is returned to you or if ever is. I just love doing these kinds of things and it always feels pretty amazing. There are no words to describe the feeling. About a year ago, it happened to me. Someone actually bought me my coffee while in the drive through line and I immediately thought about my action few years prior. All I could do was smile all the way home.
The truth is, kind things have always happened to me. Now that I am older, I reflect on them and it’s amazing how beautiful the circle of return is.
What about an act of kindness towards a human who perhaps doesn’t like you and when you help them, they don’t even know about it? I’ve done it multiple times too. There is something so appealing to help a person who would least expect it from you.
It doesn’t matter if the people know or don’t know about your help and I rather they did not. If you can help anyone it’s all the same as is the inner reward.
Help is universal and speaks all languages. People can be so uptight and hung up on so many issues in life, they so easily forget the simple human nature of some things that cannot be explained.
It is not how much you do,
but how much love you put
into the doing that matters.
– Mother Theresa –
There is something magical about birthdays. Everyone wants their special day to be filled with fun & laughter, amazement and significance celebrating their day of birth. This year I got just that. AMAZING beyond words!
First of all, my birthday has always been about wanting to celebrate it with my mom. I’ve held the highest respect for her my whole life & the fact she gave me life and brought me into this world. Becoming a mother myself only reconfirmed the love she feels for me as my love for my own children is colossal.
It began yesterday with the incredible surprise of a fabulous camera cake my mom baked for me. The story of it is here but I’ll still have to give credits with photos below.
Birthdays just like Christmas have never been about gifts for me. I’ve so enjoyed the little things my kids have made me over the last few years and each birthday is special and unique. Even prior to that… I’d lie if I didn’t get excited receiving a thoughtful gift because I would love it, however it has never been about anything materialistic. This one however somehow tops the charts on my “b-day-meter” and if another like this ever happens again, only time will tell.
My son who is 6 was barely awake on Sunday morning with his eyes still sleepy as I sipped on my cup of brew asked me in confusion, “momma you turned 93”? and then his eyes got even bigger as he looked over at me. It put a smile on my face and I nearly choked on my coffee. He picked up the two candles on the counter from the cake my mom baked for me the night prior & he was puzzled for a minute. It was so priceless, and yet the “F” word was never mentioned at all.
I got deliveries of flowers, birthday cards, special and delicious dinner cooked by my amazing husband, earrings from my baby girl she got “with daddy’s money” as she said, a lovely cross & so many surprises throughout the day. I loved all of it!
First of all, I’ve been holding back a little if I haven’t let on that the fact I’m approaching the turn of another decade is literally around the corner. The “F” word somehow ever so slightly bothers me but not because of age. I don’t believe age has anything to do with how we feel on the inside. I embrace my years & hopefully age gracefully. I think it’s just the concept of the “age” itself as people seem to be going through some midlife crisis and I totally don’t feel remotely to my age.
Good friend has told me that I’m actually 39 plus 9 months and that makes sense. Closer to the “F” word then I thought. haha!
Turning forty doesn’t scare me. There I said it. It’s been a joke in my family for probably 5 years since I’ve reached the “over the hill” mark after 35. I think mostly women are the ones affected by these number sequence of keeping track of years lived. For me, I’ve always told my kiddies, when the years get closer the “F” word is not to be said. “Mommy is and always will be 29” I told my kids, no matter who asks you. Keeping a light heart about it of course as only I know the depth of it’s meaning & the reason behind the “F” word.
Ok, the fact we call it the “F” word is because of many reasons.
We do not call anyone fat, rather plump or well build.
We do not say any “F” bombs especially the ones mommy and day may slip.
We do our best not to say fart but toot.
We do not say find rather reach to “find” something.
And we do not under any circumstance say forty when it comes to mom.
|Beautiful card and a cross from the kiddies and my husband|
|Earrings from my baby girl bought with “daddy’s money”|
|On the RIGHT is my amazing cake my mom baked for me.|
|Card image from my little 3 month old nephew “boogie time” written inside.|
|Stuffed duckie from my nephew|
|received my 1st flowers by delivery|
|“LIFE is simple – it is people who complicate it”|
And then is heard no more: It is a tale told by an idiot,
Yes. Beautiful. Twisted. Sad. Happy. Seen. Heard. Tasted. Felt. Written. All together – perfectly crazy.
There is something soothing after a huge ripple in my week. Well, one that felt like a flipping title wave no kidding, no matter how heated it got, no matter how mad or sad I became at a situation nor how much I’ve cried, my week ends on the same note but the feeling somehow uplifted. Thank gawd!
After numerous quick conversations today my heart began feeling lighter after the crazy morning & week. Revealing something so personal & sharing with another female today summarizing my few past years left me so empowered and filled with decisions I simply must do. Do not neglect yourself. You come first!
We question how normal we are and others too how they act, if this or that is normal – but we are all human. Let’s face it. My normal, is totally not your normal, and your normal could be the best or totally blah.
Decisions we make have to be the best ones for us & we can’t always look at others and how it affects them. In the end, we do what is right for us & we have to. Considering all respectable levels of discipline and conduct. Sometimes people make decisions for us and even if we don’t know it or question it – why, don’t understand it, it remains to be a leap of faith that the path is ours and we have to walk it. Alone. Even if a decision was made for you & forced you to alter a path, it is really not that bad. That’s life. I believe the good Lord knows best and leave it up to fate.
The clinical definition of ultimate high/lows is bi-polar perhaps when the norm takes a turn and twist into the dips of abnormal highs and lows & uncontrollable rage surfaces from that and I’ve seen a share in my life from people that I have no control over if they are or are not in my life. Knowing who you are and how you handle yourself is all you can rely on at the end of the day. People aren’t crazy. Life is. Even if the people in it appear crazy or totally uncontrollable & spiteful, it’s the life.
Today, finally I’ve come to terms with few issues that have felt like a giant elephant sitting on my chest & had to deal with, where people in my life are concerned. Family, friends it’s all the same. I feel so much lighter.
Their shit, is their shit. There is no sugar coating it. My shit is mine and why mix it up. That would be pretty shitty! I know what’s best for me and that’s all that matters.
Seeking inner peace is what does it for me, sharing, talking with someone who can perhaps understand your situation and empathize. Then there is the nature. LOVE the nature and connecting to it. It revives me.
There are also my friends. God bless ya!! Those of course entitled to that crown. There are some very good listeners out there among my friends. Thank you for being what a friend is suppose to be and believing in me.
Crazy as it is and sounds…… life is perfect because of imperfections. Period! It would be boring otherwise. I accept that much. I’ll take my crazy, roller-coaster, insane, spontaneous life over a boring life any day. With all that is thrown at me. I never say NO!
Thank goodness I can see it, heart it, taste it, smell it and feel it. I must be crazy! Are you?
What do you get when you put two women in a room together that go way back over 20 years & who are looking for an adventure? One amazing day!!
No wine was needed today, only a stage of cameras, lights, action, dressing and undressing, laughter, Adele’s 19 & 21 and one hot model who gave it her all. She was simply fabulous. I experienced one of those days that goes down to history. It’s safe to say I gave her exactly what she wanted and needed, while she provided me with further confidence, experience and one remarkable photo shoot.
Oh the fun I’ll have for days editing. Oh the emails already with requests. Amazing!! Simply amazing….. & I love it!
I’m so looking forward to the fashion show I’ve got the opportunity to photograph too. This was just the boost I needed. I’m so pumped with everything upcoming. This is going to be the year.
When it rains it pours and I’m facing the rain smiling extended both hands up…… bring it on baby! My life is unforgettable because of all the people who make is so special, and that included YOU.
Thanks a million,
Do you ever find yourself question how in the heck could that be? It can be anything.
I’ve encountered this so many times I lost count. I get a feeling or an idea and while I’m literally creating it, implementing or designing it, someone else I may or may not know creates it nearly instantly. I cannot express the inquisitiveness I’ve held for such coincidences. Or are they? Coincidences that is.
Well, I for one don’t believe in coincidence so I dug a little deeper into the concept of what it could be few years ago. I’ve never written about it until now due to the recent other similar comparison to another artist.
Universal Consciousness. I’ve been living and co-creating with that in the back of my mind ever since. We all tap into it. Everyone. It sounds far fetched when you compare the basic concept to the Borg from Start Trek but it’s so true.
“We are Borg.
Lower your shields and surrender your ships,
and prepare yourself to be assimilated.
We will add your biological
and technological distinctiveness to our own.
Resistance is futile.“
Are we all that different from a cybernetic lifeform? The way I see it, we are not far from reaching this technological advancement, theory or whatever it may be in the next few decades. With the technology & the way we are collectively connected within social media, Internet communicating, networking, etc. it isn’t just science & fiction. It is real.
We, humans, all intellectual beings on this Earth and perhaps in the entire universe are connected to a source higher then our own comprehension. We have been ever since the existence of mankind began. It is the mere pillar of consciousness, light, universal portal we all feed from weather it be ideas, fashion, dreams, desires, innovations, artistic flair, whatever….
For me, it must have began years ago when I was much younger and my art teacher would always praise me for my eye for detail in all my highschool sketches. I would get double marks for some works. But, I didn’t fully appreciate the praise until my painting “Roots of Gaia” was compared to Frida Khalo’s (1907-1954) marvelous work by a complete stranger.
In her lifetime Frida has created some 200 pieces of work related to her experiences and life. She’s a unique artist who’s soulful sorrow is evident in many of her human depictions as is her profound rooted loneliness in her many self portraits.
The day I was told that my piece slightly resembled her work, I had no clue who she even was. I’ve Googled her and when I found out a little about her life I was quite flattered to have been compared to her piece just below mine. Since then, I’ve observed her work as unique, one of kind visual work of an extraordinary visionary and artist.
Roots of Gaia – by Janette Dengo
By Frida Khol
For me, there is always a magical experience with each painting I create. If somehow I’ve managed to subconsciously tap into anyone’s visual creation, their naked concept for basis of their entire image, sculpture, photo, imagination and ideas, I can with honest heart say it’s due to the universal consciousness. Weather it be a prior, current or future timeline I cannot be responsible for similarities of such.
The bottom line is everyone looks to be unique and stand out in one aspect or another. Let it be artist, painters, fashionistas, jewellery designers, photographers, sculptors, etc. Everyone wants to be know for their own unique imprint, such is our own DNA as it solely reflects the artist behind the creation. Sometimes, and the world is vast, we cannot and are unable to get away from certain visual comparisons that may be so evident in similarities of others. It is beyond our control.
I use to get a little annoyed at people I’d encounter in my life if they would buy for example the same clothes as me and the next time I’d see them, they’d say “oh, you have one of those too?” I’d get irked and roll my eyes, but now I could care less. If anything it is flattering they found my style tasteful and had to get one for themselves. Some people get their panties all in a knot over the fact someone may be imitating them and fully believe it, only to have nothing but ill feelings all made up in their heads that they are right out copying them or stealing their ideas. Bull!
My suggestion: Get over yourself & breathe a little. Nobody is treading on your heals and stealing your ideas. The world is vast, the people in it are all inspired by something or someone all the time.
Remaining confident that the art created by you, me and the world all holds uniqueness, beauty and one of a kind visual concept is the key. Confidence with a capital “C”. It is as irrelevant as if someone had the same shoes as you at a party.
“People think they are ground breakers but they are only treading on the path of others” – so eloquently put by my hubby Anthony. Always. Civilization has existed for how long? Is it really that insulting to people who get their backs raised that someone imitated or flat out copied them? Actors, models, all types of divas out there on the red carpets find themselves in similar if not identical outfits, all the time. Does that mean we should bring out the guns?
Someone out there is and will always be similar to your work because after all – you yourself has gotten a visual inspiration from someone else that may be not so flattered you right out “stole” their idea if that’s how you see it. If you put those thoughts into your head & get paranoid of people stealing your ideas, you will loose the battle in the artists industry, in whatever it is you are creating.
Feel the confidence you are unique, execute it and don’t worry about the rest. People will always pick up on imitations, because if someone doesn’t have the talent, they can paint, photograph, chisel away, cut, sew, stitch their little hearts away and it will never be you! You are IT! You and only you. There is nor will there ever be another you. But let’s get back to Frida and me for now 🙂
For me Frida represents something deep. The roots of the mere Earth – Gaia – the Goddess – as I seek to find her in my above creation. She isn’t that far from the mere concept of the “universal consciousness”. A feminine creation connecting to the source, the light, love, universal being of the roots we all tap into. Even though I wasn’t directly inspired by Frida, her image somewhat haunts me in a positive way. While I was told to use certain colours and stay away from reds – it is what came into my mind with the piece I created for my client with them and their lifestyle in mind. The fact it was unveiled there is a a similarity is quite uncanning. By the way, the client loved my creation & it was evident in their eyes full of tears & gratitude.
We all tap into it. Whatever the universal consciousness is. I cannot seem to get ahead of it. I’ve had ideas that made people millionaires so with that knowledge, in the comfort of my own home I reap a little of those millions they have – even if my pockets are empty because I know I too had that idea at the same time they did.
If someone took my image and put their name on it & unfortunately there are people like that out there & I’ve known of few artists that have succumbed to those thieves, that is the only illegal form of theft punishable by law. This is also only if your image and photo is protected by the copyright and each laws in each state, province, country is different so it’s best to check into that.
While my Roots of Gaia was one of the pieces I was probably the most intimidated to give away & present to my client as a final piece of work/product, it is probably one of my finest works.
Thank you so much to all who inspire me, give me confidence to keep on creating and encourage me to continue on my artistic journey. Love you all very much from the roots of my entire creative consciousness.
Peace, love & light.